E63: Be Inspired by Many, But Influenced by Few (Monthly Reflection)

April 2026 was filled with a lot of great moments from the guests on the show. We explored:

- Trusting your gut, not your fear
- Moving from paycheck to purpose
- The discipline of success
- Why leaders actually burnout 
- Stop faking success as people can see right through you
- Working hard vs. staying stuck
- The power of your life force
- The importance of your identity

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

All right. Welcome to the April 2026 sort of recap. You know, be inspired by many, but influenced by few. And the guests this month were awesome as they always are. And we'll start off right with, you know, the first one with Jenny C. Cohen. Her podcast was Dance to Heal. And some things that really stood out to me, and I, you know, when I was talking to her, you know, she was on my show, I was on her show, is that it goes back to, you know, the first book that I wrote, The Impression of a Good Life, Finding Your Song and Dance. And we were conversing back and forth. All I could think about is people finding their song and dance, right? She was a dancer, sort of like career she had. And then all of a sudden she had this kind of cancer scare, and her life had to change course. And what I loved about the story was that, you know, she still loves dance. You know, I think she's still doing it. Is that, you know, we don't know if things that happen to us are good or bad, right? She had these aspirations of being this professional dancer. And now it's turned her down this sort of different road in life. And the one thing that she said that really stood out was trust your gut, not fear. And the thing about that is we have a lot of fear in our lives, right? We are always fearing that we're not doing the right thing, we're making mistakes, we're not going down the right path, if you will. And there's this sort of like internal gut instinct that we have. And sure it's not calibrated, right? You could say that, oh, your gut instinct is right or wrong half the time, or whatever the percentages. But there is an element to trusting your gut, trusting that instinct, trusting that you have enough experience, right, in life. You know, for those listening to the podcast, or you're not three years old, right? You're, you're, you've been living on this planet for a while now. So you have a lot of these experiences to know more or less predicted outcomes, if you will. And sometimes, yeah, there is an element of risk taking to what we do. And one of the things that she also sort of grounded me down, just to remind me as well, when I was on the show with her, was that self-care is non-negotiable. And today, you know, it just reminds me back to when we talked in with Trisha Venateri in episode, I believe, 51, where, you know, yoga is this thing of like, okay, it's going to help with burnout. We should implement it. Yes, that self-help care self-care is definitely we need it, right? And I think we have to place it into our schedule more. But it's beyond just going to yoga class. It's also taking time in the day to just be content, be still. And I think that is sort of a powerful thing, really, for you know, anyone today is just finding that sense of stillness. And then the other side of that is too, what, you know, with her being on the show is that Jenny also reminded me that, you know, yes, stillness is key, but also their sense of movement can bring about harmony too, right? So in yoga, we talk about like finding stillness, and that's important, right? From sort of a meditative, you know, aspect and practicing our internal dialogue, trying to see clearly. But there is an element to music allowing us to discover who we are. So yeah, sometimes in my car, I'll definitely, you know, crank up the tool song or album that I'm really digging or rage against the machine of late and just kind of vibe with that. And there's something to be said with the music that you listen to resonates with really who you are. And then there was Larionan. And, you know, it's interesting, you know, with him, I could definitely sense, you probably sensed if you haven't listened to the episode, that, you know, he was trying to, I don't say trigger in a bad way, sort of, you know, politics. I didn't want the show to turn into, you know, talking about politics. But as you're going to see, actually, in the month of May 2026, Vanessa uh gets on the show and we actually talk about politics because I guess that was sort of a seed from Larry saying that, you know, years ago he said that we could talk about politics and it'd be okay. Right now it's so divided, Democrat and Republican, and those scared to get into the mix of the conversation, they declare themselves independent. And then you have, you know, people like myself, I'll be honest with you, where I don't even really know what's going on, in the sense of it's hard to stay up to date with all the facts and the news and you know, all the different laws that you need to vote for. And yes, I'm registered to vote and do my voting. And but it's like I don't even know what I'm answering half the time. But that's for another conversation. But he did strike that in me when he brought it up. But one of the things that he really talked about was, you know, going from that paycheck to purpose, right? And it's kind of really what he described as changing this idea of that you're trading time to creating value. And of course, you know, I love talking about value. There's two different meanings of value, just to remind you, you know, we talk about the first meaning of value as the standards for which you're to live your life. And that's creating value. But obviously we need to make a living, right? And that's kind of what the show has, you know, has explored as well, right? People's emotions and thoughts with money as well. And that, yes, we create the standards for which we're to live our life, but also what something is worth, right? Because let's face it, you know, even as I'm doing this podcast, all the costs to, you know, subscription fees for Riverside and Buzz Sprout and PodMatch and the equipment, it costs money, right? Then there's this idea of cultivating an ownership mindset and what he says a rapidly disruptive age, right? And the thing about like today is the disruption's everywhere, right? It's just in terms of social media, you hear me sort of almost like complain, but that's how I feel of late. I know I need to be more positive that a skill that I'm working on there is how to see social media and technology as a skill instead of this sort of this negative thing based on my master's work, you know, in psychology, looking at the effects of social media. And just a quick recap there, you know, found that from the shallowing hypothesis that, you know, the more we use fast-paced social media, it's going to lead to increase in narcissism, increase in depression, and a decrease in critical thinking. And it's why I sometimes talk about a lot, sometimes on the show, about phone use, because I just worry that we rely on it too much. Now, you might be listening to this podcast, of course, on your phone, which is great, right? So that's what I love about one aspect of technology. I listen, listen to my favorite podcasts as well, good books and of course music. And, you know, Larry brings about this idea though, it's that it's about intention with what you're doing, right? The power of intention when you're living life, when you're doing your work. And he sort of grounds that in the ability to identify and align your natural strengths for the sort of greater achievement. And one of the things that I encourage people to do, you know, you as a listener, go on any sort of website and look at, you know, do the strengths finder thing. I think I've done that probably 10 times over. And it's just interesting. They always kind of, you know, which ones stay at the top, they always, well, they're always still the same. And figure out your strengths because that to me is the building blocks for how you're going to be authentic, right? How you can show up because you're relying on your strengths in a society that's constantly, you know, quick to say, this is your weakness, this is your fault, this is what's going wrong. And I think we need to remember, you know, that we've done a lot right. I think of the simple, you know, key process indicator, they call them KPIs and manufacturing. You know, when you're manufacturing something, of course you want to make good product. And, you know, the metric is something like, you know, 5% or less we want for relative scrap. And the problem with I have, the problem I have with that metric is that, you know, we talk about it in a negative light. We say 5% is crap, but we overlook sometimes the 95% was good. So just a quick sort of sort of you know, shift in that mindset of saying, okay, instead of 5% is bad, hey, we did 95% good. How do I get 96% good? How do we get 97% good? And I think that comes down to recognizing your strengths, right? But not being so, you know, oblivious to what you're should, what you should be doing, right, in terms of things that you need to improve upon. And, you know, the thing that also kind of stuck, you know, with with Larry is that, you know, we have these unexpected things that that can happen to us, right? And they can spark reinvention. And it's sort of a theme, right, with, you know, Jenny and other, you know, people you've been listening on the podcast is that work sometimes that I find, you know, in people and in myself really has strong purpose when we've gone through these sort of like moments, these experiences, right? I've gotten fired from a job. I got told in high school I'd never passed, you know, college by a guidance counselor. And, you know, these things you could label as bad, as negative, but if you treat them as sort of like, you know, a place to reinvent yourself, that's when you're going to make, you know, to me, a difference in what you're doing. Then we had Stanley. So talk about making a difference. I loved his, you know, whole line there of going, you know, from 367 pounds, right, to this disciplined life. And, you know, yes, I guess like what's interesting, I was thinking about the other day in terms of people are asking me, I've been getting on other podcasts, and people ask me why I'm so against like these self-help hacks and, you know, what are your five steps to happiness and all this sort of bull crap? And it's not that I'm against them, but I just made me think of like, it's like a diet, right? We want the quick results, but the challenge is to stick with it. And I think that's what really Stanley brought in this episode was really demonstrating the systems that he put in place to really bring about the success from losing the weight to keeping it off. I don't know how he works out at night. That was beyond me. I think he gets up at like midnight and goes and works out, but that's crazy. But, you know, he he walks every day. And I think he just reminded me that, you know, the hard work, it sucks, right? Who wants to wake up at midnight and go to the gym? Who wants to eat a certain way, you know, to stay healthy? Because, you know, when you eat sugar and you eat all these things that are bad for you, it's it's programming the brain to say, oh, this is really good, right? And again, there's a whole science behind these things, a whole marketing behind these things to get you addicted. I like what he said in terms of learn to think in decades. And really, again, that goes back to sort of my dislike for all these hacks because they're short term. We want quick results, we want to play the lottery so we win. But, you know, in terms of like long endeavors, you know, in terms of living life, we have to think ahead. We have to plan ahead, right? If you're gonna have a family, I like to think that you plan ahead, right? Where are you gonna raise your family? Where are you gonna meet, right? And who you're gonna be when you're, you know, you have kids. And same thing with work, right? And when you step into the workplace, do you see yourself working on the company? Do you see yourself growing in that company, or maybe you're just using it as a stepping stone? So when you learn to think in decades and not just, oh, the same shit, different day, you know, waiting for the weekend, you have this sort of like strategy now, this system. And one of the things that, you know, Stanley indicates too is that good enough is good enough, right? So striking that sort of like realization that what you're doing sometimes is good enough. And I think that's key to understanding burnout. Because, you know, when I I just finished up this statistics homework, I'm on my, I finished my 11th assignment out of 12. And this class is kicking my ass. It's advanced statistics and psychology research. You know, we went over structural equation modeling. I mean, you know, years ago I took statistics, right? You know, you get your normal distribution, yada, yada. And it's like, you know, now I'm going over this class. It's funny because of the the office hours. The professor was like, man, what assignment are you doing? Like, what class are you in? And he was just kind of like shocked that I was bringing up these sort of relatively complex, you know, quantitative approaches in psychological research. And it's been good, right? But then I going back to the point of good enough is good enough, you know, I read through the assignments, I did the best I could, and I said to myself, you know what? I feel good about it. Good enough is good enough. Is it going to get 100? I don't know. Right. But we've learned to think, again, looking ahead, I'm in it for the long haul, right? I have another year and a half, you know, to finish my thesis. You know, I've got two more classes after I finish this quantitative statistics or the statistics course here. And, you know, again, I want to see the bigger picture, right? So having a little, I want to say defeat in the current moment, but really just letting go that it doesn't have to be perfect. It's messy. This class has been tough as shit. Like I literally don't know how to describe, you know, how challenging statistics has been for me. I mean, I spent a ton of hours working on it. But this goes back again to Stanley, you know, saying that it's all about really discipline. He had the discipline and the consistency to keep the weight off, right? 367 pounds to what I forget what he said he was today, but that's a lot. That's that's a lot. Like to lose a lot of weight and to be that heavy, you know. He realized, hey, I got to make some changes. And then we got to Naomi Asher. And of course, I loved her, you know, I just said I'm finishing my thing on my PhD, and she worked on hers. So I wanted to really dive into, you know, of course, her thesis and whatnot. And I love where she was coming from, right? So why are leaders burning out? And, you know, she indicated in her PhD work that it wasn't about the workload. It wasn't about the compensation. She knew that, right? She had that go back to that gut instinct. She found that it's really the lack of growth opportunities and mission alignment. And that just resonates so much with Mihai, Chick-Sent Mihai's sort of original work on flow with the paradox of work. And when he, you know, had this experiment where he would, you know, it's called the experience sampling method, ESM, where he would go into the workplace and give these, they had, you know, uh pagers, beepers back then, right? And when the pager, the beeper went off, these participants would write what they were doing. And what he found, you know, years ago, still relevant today, is that people found these flow states at work, but when they were asked where they'd rather be, they said anywhere but work. And so Mihay attributed that to sort of what Naomi kind of was saying here in this episode was that there's sort of a value misalignment, right, with the employees and the company. And that's something for upper management to really consider. I love also that she, you know, went from her music degree, right, to this work in, you know, more or less psychology. And that she said it really well because I get sick and tired of people saying that, like, oh, my college degree, I don't use it. But it's like your college degree taught you discipline. Go back to Stanley, right? You're thinking four years, right? Think, it's not decades, but you're thinking long term, right? And that's the skill that you're learning. You're learning to time manage, you're learning to, you know, my freshman year was kind of a shit show. I had a 2. I think like seven GPA, which is terrible out of 4.0, right? Having come from like almost straight A's out of high school. So maybe my guidance counselor was saying something there. But no, it was because I was partying. I was going out, I wasn't studying like I should. And once I realized, oh crap, my dad said, you know, you're paying for this, I was like, oh, well, I'm paying for this. I need to really get my act together. And so, you know, I finished my undergrad and of course going through my master's and now my my PhD. But the skills are transferable, as Naomi suggested, right? So even though she's not using her music degree in her current work, those skills still apply. So if you, listener that, you know, you have this college degree and you think it's useless, it's not. You draw upon the times when that class sucked. What did you do? Did you reach out for help? Did you go see the professor? Hopefully they knew what the assignment was to do, right? But think to, you know, those experiences, right? Forget the language around what you were doing. Think in terms of the system for how you solve the problem. I think that's what college really kind of reminded, or thinking back on college, that's what I really learned. And so Naomi also goes into another kind of like fun topic, you know, I've been exploring on the show is that of burnout. And it's funny because when I, you know, first started the show in July of 2025, I didn't think like burnout was on sort of like a topic. It was a topic. And, you know, people coming on and describing the show, they say it's like, oh, well, this is how you, you know, high achievers, if you will, perform and you don't burn out. So it's great. I, you know, that's the beautiful thing about this kind of like project. I don't know where it's going, you know, and I just kind of love that sort of excitement too. But, you know, burnouts and work-life balance. And I'm always talking about that it's, you know, really due to, again, that misalignment, right? It's not about workload. It's not about compensation. And, you know, I think I asked, I think I asked a question about work-life balance. And she indicates that it's not about splitting time perfectly, but really investing in what truly matters, right? There's a sort of theme with these listeners, with these people coming out of the show of investing in things that truly matter, right? And that's such an open-ended question, right? Because you could say that, you know, does my nine to five matter? Does my entrepreneur work matter? And, you know, it's not an easy answer, right? Most people think that they need to quit their nine to five and be an entrepreneur because that's what the American society says, and we're going to really find our passion. But it's not because there's aspects, remember, I could just go back to my brother and interviewing him and how much he found that, you know, running a business is great. He gets to do what he loves to do, but there's aspects that just suck and he hates it, right? He's got a team now to help him with his taxes and the insurance and everything else. But running a business is challenging. But the point is, you know, really when you show up in the day, Naomi just does this perfectly to me, and that she looks at, and she even admitted, like she's working on Sunday nights, right? And late in the night, because it's about investing in what matters. It doesn't matter what time of day it is. It doesn't matter, you know, what day it is, right? If it's a Sunday or a Monday or whatever. It's doing the thing you think that matters. That's work. And I'm really loving that sort of vibe, that definition that people are sort of sharing on the show. And, you know, one last thing with Naomi, you know, I have come across, you know, a lot of personality, you know, questionnaires, NEA Gram, and all these other things. And she went through this sort of like, you know, fun exercise of how I think I was a, you know, an achiever, a number three, and talking about how, you know, her number, I forget what it is now, was, you know, could work with mine. And the point I'd like to make for you, for the listener today, is that think about, you know, personalities, maybe do a personality test, I guess is what I'm getting at. Because I've enjoyed studying them over the years. And I think what helps is they're not always, even if you do the zodiac, right? Some, I guess, an element of like personality too. But find something that sort of like resonates with you. And the reason why I say this is it goes back to this concept of a system again, right? Think in terms of systems. The beautiful thing of an Enneagram is it kind of shows the strengths and sort of the things that you have to be aware of when you're working with others. And I think when, you know, you sort of start with that, right? And then maybe you'll realize, okay, well, it doesn't always apply to this. So let me learn something else. But if you start learning these different sort of personality styles, think of like the library you're now sort of accumulating. And so when you encounter sort of a shitty, you know, situation with work, you can draw upon this and be like, oh, is this person like a high achiever like me? I wonder why we're butting heads, right? And now I can take a step back and, you know, work with this person, right? Kind of put my ego aside, but also come in with the level of confidence that, no, no, no, there's like systems that are kind of proven, if you will, relatively speaking, that I can use to help navigate this tricky situation. And then we had Scott Mater. And, you know, as I mentioned, you know, when I introduced him, I met him at Podfest. He was hanging out at, you know, Alex's booth, you know, with PodMatch. And, you know, they they could all tell, again, I was really messed up, right? I had a concussion and wasn't really 100%. And so Scott was the man because he kept checking in on me. You know, and even when I got home, he sent me a personal message, say, you know, um, how you doing? Just making sure everything was okay. So thanks again, Scott. I can't say it enough. And, you know, his message was was beautiful, right? Is that success isn't about how things look, but how they feel. And, you know, we've heard the saying before, you fake it till you make it. But you know, there's times when it's like you understand it, right? But that goes back to that shortcut. It goes back to that diet, right? We think that we're solving this problem with sort of a shortcut. We have to dig into the consistency, the systems that you're using, because uh people are gonna see right through you. If you're just like faking the success, like, oh, I want. To drive a certain car or a truck or whatever, and I want to have a house and I want to post my, you know, beautiful, you know, family or vacation or whatever. And I'm not saying that's not success, right? But there's a difference between how it looks and how it feels, right? And for some of you, just go onto your social media, right, and do sort of a check and say, hey, is this person, you know, actually doing the things to be successful? Maybe question how do they feel when they're doing it. Now, another thing about online is that you can take multiple pictures, right, and get your best looking one, you know, if you will. But, you know, I think it's a skill that we need to develop today. I guess I'll just say it, like seeing through the bullshit, right? And it's a very fine line, right? I'm not suggesting that I can read people's minds. I certainly can't, right? No one can, you know, and even for you determinists out there thinking that consciousness is solved, it's not because how do you solve the hard problem from David Chalmer? Whole other episode there. Love to explore it for those that want to challenge that sort of you know notion or really concept of, you know, qualia. How do you, you know, how does a robot taste a juicy apple? But anyways, I go on this sort of like tangent. But basically, you know, seeing through, again, people's actions. And to me, I guess, you know, where, especially as a podcast host, I'm trying to understand, going back to Jenny's sort of point, of seeing their song and dance, right? I want to see what makes them tick, their beats, right? Their beliefs, emotions, actions, thoughts. This is a concept that I talk a lot about in my first book, right? The impression of a good life, finding your song and dance. Because if you can find your song and dance, you can start to see other people's song and dance. And why is that important? Because we're all in a band. So if I'm playing, you know, rock music and I got someone, you know, that's playing, you know, folk music, that's going to be a problem. And, you know, if I don't recognize that, hey, I need to really listen to what's being said. And that, and I use that example because in the Nowhere Kids, I'll never forget it. My brother and, you know, our friend Brett drove out to Ohio, where I was living at the time, and we started the band, Nowhere Kids. And I just remember in the office, I had my electronic drum set, and my brother's trying to convince us that, yeah, it's gonna work. You know, you guys are awesome. And the three of us are sitting there in this room, and we could just feel the friction. Like Brett and I were just like, oh man, I don't know if it's gonna work. Brett likes folk. I like 70s rock, you know, alternative rock. I think my brother said something, and he's like, You guys just need to be yourself, like get our head out of our asses almost. And all of a sudden, we busted out like one of our first songs, Hollow. And it was just like, and then it was like it was almost like the gate was taken away, the wall was broken down. And, you know, I just I share that because I'm not suggesting that you can't work with others, but I think, you know, as a drummer, that you have to see the beats in people. And when you can find that steady beat, then you can work with them. And so going back to kind of what Scott was talking about, this isn't a one-time photograph. This isn't a one-time sort of thing. You're constantly jamming. He, like he says, all of our lives are film strips, they're not photographs. And, you know, making connections like I did that day with, you know, my now friend Brett, and of course, you know, building my relationship with my brother, it wasn't about a transaction, right? We weren't transacting notes. I wasn't hitting drum beats to his guitar, you know, or his words. It was about a connection. It was about trying to, how do I take what I want to say and, you know, incorporate it with what this other person is saying? And I take a, I learned this from a drum circle years ago. I was, you know, part of one, and then the leader couldn't make it. And so he, you know, asked me, could you run this drum circle? And of course I was really nervous. And he said basically two things to me, and I'll never forget it. There were two rules to connecting with people when they come into the drum circle. And it was one, people are going to come in and they're nervous. They feel like they don't have anything to play. They suck at drums. And he said, No, that's wrong because everyone has a heartbeat. So as long as you can follow that heartbeat, you can play the drums or the drum. And then the other thing was that when you play in a group, you have to keep this one thought in mind that whatever you intend to play, you need to, or whatever you play, you need to, you know, make the group sound better. And I love that, right? Because, you know, going back to that, that sort of moment in my office in Ohio with, you know, my brother Brett and myself playing our musical instruments, I could have sat there and said, you know, screw you guys, I'm playing rock music. I ain't listening to shit what you're gonna say. And, you know, I needed to take a step back. Yes, I checked off the first thing, right? I have a heartbeat, play the drums, play the, you know, whatever. But then it was like, okay, how do I make the group sound better? Right. And Scott kind of like goes into this as well, where he says you need to invest in yourself, then invest in others. And again, going back to that sort of time with the music, if I didn't invest practicing the drums, my rudiments that sucked by the way. I hated practicing rudiments. I still to this day, I don't, you know, just between you and me. Um, but I should be. And, you know, it makes you better, right? It's kind of the basics of everything. Um, it's that when you practice those things, then you can be in a place to practice with others, right? It comes back to the kind of like self-help thing where, you know, the the plane is, you know, in a state of an emergency and the oxygen masks fall, and you have to put your oxygen mask on first before you can help the other person put theirs on. And so every flavor you want to put it, hopefully your plane's not burning, falling down either. But the point is like investing yourself, as Scott says, and then investing in others. So then we get to Alan, who's all about investing his time in others, right? He's a coach, and it was interesting to hear his goals, right, be shared kind of on the show, which I thought was kind of cool. And, you know, his sort of thing was like coach more, earn more, and delegate more, sort of sort of his song and dance now, his you know, mantra. What was what I loved about his story was that, you know, of course, I love talking about the nine of five and also sort of the entrepreneur, right? And so he works at nine of five. And, you know, everyone's got this fear around automation, taking over jobs. And sure enough, for Alan, that was that. Automation is happening with or without us. And he found at his experience, it's taking out jobs. And so he's on this mission now to create jobs. And I love that, right? So that's sort of like to me, you know, kind of the entrepreneur, right? Not the one who's gonna do their own thing. Yes, they are. He is doing his own thing, but he's doing it like based on sort of like this mission, right? He wants to help other people to find work that resonates with them. And I think that's incredible, right? Building this sort of company that he has and a team that he has so they can work with him so they have a job, if you will. And of course, you know, I love, as you know, you hear me say it on the show a lot now, is what is the one thing that sucks about your work and what are you doing to make it not suck? And, you know, he said the thing about diet, right? Which I think is hilarious, you know, the kind of ripping on diet in terms of like the the self-help hack of today. But I know what he's getting at in terms of, you know, basically what I liked when he said the hardest part in terms of like, you know, what's sucking is in terms of working out is the food that he needs to eat so he can have his six pack, you know. And I think that's what's missing today, right, with self-help is that yes, we all want the six pack and the the swimsuit body, if you will. But what's gonna suck is doing all those things, right, to get that. And that's hard, right? And that's kind of what he talks about. And then also what sucked for him too was social media, which, you know, for me, as you know, I've deleted Facebook. And just because of the values, right, I don't really align with Facebook. I know Instagram, you know, is now owned by whatever it is, MetaNow. And, you know, Instagram I do like, although I hardly ever use it as well. But, you know, I guess like that's where I'm still trying to work on myself. You know, I was talking with someone the other day, and the next episode on the show is actually going to be me um sharing kind of my thoughts, the work that I'm doing on book three, with um, you know, in a rush to go nowhere, finding Shivasana. So kind of tying back to yoga being a tool to help us with our work. But that's for the next episode. But what I want to sort of state today is that I was getting this conversation um with a friend about how social media can be used in a constructive way. And I think that's still something I need to sort of work on, right? And then we had Delia Schaefer and talk about, you know, this kind of now stepping into her work, right? So she talks about life force, right? So in yoga, there's a term called prana, which is your life force. And, you know, to me, like whether you believe that or not, you know, in the third book, I kind of joke that it's like, oh, like Metaclorians, you know, if you're Star Wars nerd like I am, and whatever, right? We're trying to get our life force up. And I love Delia's message on that. And, you know, most people think of an asset as like their business, you know, you know, if you're again, I'm gonna use the word asset like Robert Kiyosaki here. Most people think their house is an asset. It's not. And if you don't resonate with that, I recommend that you read Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki. I'm not associated with him, I've never met him, but anyways, I do agree with his definition of what an asset is, right? And these are just words, right? So just kind of take that in mind as you listen to this. But the asset that you're investing in is your life force when you do this work. And I love her sort of, you know, concept of these spiritual assets, right? So when I was thinking about that when she was talking about it on the show and reflecting afterwards, that's my yoga practice, right? That is my even hiking mountains, right? It's even my, you know, sort of reading of certain books, right? This Eastern philosophy that I enjoy reading. And I'll admit, like quantum, you know, mechanics, you know, diving into sort of string theory again for a little bit, that kind of dance in and out of it. I just love the concepts. But those are all sort of spiritual to me. I don't know why I say that in terms of quantum, but I just feel like because they're sort of making it up, right? And what do I mean by that? And nothing against this, the quantum physicist, right? I love all the science, hard sciences, if you will. And of course, I guess we call the soft science now in psychology. And that, you know, when I read that, you know, with quantum mechanics, there was this concept of, you know, gravity, right? And not getting along with sort of the other three forces and string theory is trying to unite them. So right now, people are like saying, okay, I've got all these different theories out there of the strong and weak, you know, forces in the atom, and then I've got the electromechanical force, and then I've got the the gravitational force. And the problem is that three out of four can sort of dance with each other from a theory equation standpoint, but gravity sits on its own. So where am I going with the story? The point is like, you know, gravity was one person was saying, well, let's make a graviton and we'll we'll sort of make up this sort of thing. And I guess that's why I call it spiritual. Not that spiritual is made up, but I guess there's like this sort of element of like a belief, I guess is what I'm getting at there. And that there's a belief of like this these things that we don't know, right? We're kind of sometimes, I'm gonna say taking a guess, but taking an educated sort of guess, using our gut, right, instinct, if you will, to think about what's bigger than us, right? Maybe there is a graviton one day that we can measure, right? Maybe there are spirits out there that we have yet to measure that we, you know, that exist, but we don't know of yet. And so I think that, you know, Delia also kind of mentions that I really love. Of course, I asked her, you know, as a quality manager, what is the sense of quality, right? And it it kind of, you know, she talks about as sort of this quality of of life. And, you know, I think it was on a scale of zero to one, and you know, one being that, you know, had more quality of life, right? And zero was not so good. I think she mentioned he could be negative too, which I'd be interesting to read on those profiles who who comes in as negative. But I guess like it goes back to, you know, the sense of well-being, right? So the show also, I know I mentioned like burnout's been coming into the picture, but also this concept of well-being, right? How like, you know, satisfied are we with our lives? How, you know, we're gonna hear this month, you know, my best friend, actually, I think it's the next month that'll be coming onto the show. Matt, he talks about, you know, personal enrichment. People, you know, you get to a certain point where you have the job, you have the paycheck, you've got your house, you've got a car that works, all these different things. And once you hit that sort of threshold, now you're starting to measure things a little differently. Right. And it's not, some people will use the measurement, the yardstick as, well, how much money do I have? And there's an element to that, right? To sustain, right, thinking in terms of decades again. But I like what Matt talks about, again, for another episode, for another, you know, recap, if you will. But I just wanted to tease it here. He talks about personal enrichment. And I just think that's like such an important thing as a listener is to really think like, you know, that in itself, right? Just how are you enriching your own life beyond just the paycheck, beyond just the work that you do? And so one of the things that Delia talks about is that work today, we're in this sort of survival mode. And, you know, we're fighting to stay alive, right? She defined work as the thing that's sort of like is putting the roof over your head, right? So we understand that there is this sense of survival, right? Even Abraham Maslow says the bottom of the hierarchy of needs, the first need that we have is this sense of survival, right? We need the shelter, we need the food, we need the clothes. The problem is, you know, when you work in a sort of even the hustle culture of like entrepreneurs or nine to five manufacturing, there's always this like fight that we seem to be fighting every day, right? Achieving the numbers, you know, getting to the goal. But the problem is it seem to be putting out fires, is what we feel like sometimes, right? That's why work is frustrating. And that's why people are burning out, right? And I think it goes back to, you know, what Delia talks about is this disconnection really lies in ignoring the breath. And I know it's such a distant sort of concept, but imagine it, right? You have upper management like all hyped up on like the market share and you know, their profit margins and all these things. And it's like, there's like an adrenaline to that, right? And I'm not saying that's something, you know, that we want to say, I guess it's like that's part of it. But what I want to say is that we don't want to forget about being present, I guess, if you will, using the breath to stay calm, to stay collected, to see. You know, it's like going onto a battlefield. Yes, they're gonna be charged up with energy and we're gonna take on and sort of seize the day, but we also want to be calm and collected as a warrior. And that leads us to Ken Cox, which is our last guest here on the show for the month of April. And, you know, Ken owns a boxing studio. So I love his like sort of, he says success requires a war mentality. But again, we talked in terms of like, okay, there's an armor, but he even said that the best warriors don't have a lot of armor, right? He brought up the movie Gladiator, right? And that was awesome. And I love both movies, one and two. And he basically reminded me that it's the skill. And if you look at, you know, Russell Crowe in Gladiator, the first one, he's like, he's using that breath, right? He's he's he's into the he's in the Coliseum, he's going down, picking up the dirt, inhaling, he's seeing the moment, and then he gets charged up, right? And I think that's what we need to see more of in upper management, in companies, and even with entrepreneurs, right, that are still striving and you know, hungry for more likes and followers and bigger profit shares and all these other things, which is again part of the game, I understand. But using that breath. And so one of the things that Ken also talks about is that work is practice, right? Not just a task. And I love, we didn't really talk about much in terms of his boxing, but I kept thinking about it as we were talking throughout the show, in that, you know, again, an athlete, it takes practice, right? It takes work to, you know, get into the ring, to train before the, the, the boxing match, right? And it's not just a task that we're doing a checkoff. It's really, I like again, I love how he said it, it's about a practice. And it makes me think of when I was running marathons, right? And, you know, motivation isn't permanent, but you have to keep telling yourself that it is, right? It's just this mantra that you have to have. And, you know, you're again, you're yes, you are checking off that, you know, you got to the gym, you lifted the weights and this and that, but it's beyond, you know, just the black and white transaction. And one of the things that he also integrates, which I also loved, was that we need to laugh more throughout this process. And he uses comedy as a tool for, you know, team building and even self-awareness. I think it was said, like, you know, in a book, I don't know what the resource is, it's too many books. I do my best, of course, to cite things here. But, you know, there's basically it said that, you know, when you laugh at something, it basically shows kind of who you are, right? And when you can laugh at yourself, you know, like with statistics, right? When I'm working on these assignments that I have, I'm I guess I feel like I'm gaining an understanding, but it's kind of funny to step back and realize, man, there's a lot of squiggly looking symbols here. Yeah, I get what they're kind of saying, high level. I can, you know, correlate this independent variable to this dependent variable with this mediating effect, yada yada. But it's just like, man, I still have so much to learn, right? So that's the kind of laughter I think that Ken was kind of alluding to, and that I like to remind myself that, you know, it's okay to, you know, not be so serious sometimes, to enjoy the process. Oh man, I screwed up. That's okay, just laugh. And if you mess up, one of the things I tell the employees on the team, um, where I have my sort of nine to five hat on, is that, you know, own your mistake. We all make mistakes and we just have to own that. And the challenge, though, as Ken was kind of talking, is that it comes down to like identity, right? And, you know, it was interesting because he was part of the flow research collective. That's kind of how I connected, you know, with him. I saw that in his profiles. Like, oh man, I gotta talk to this guy because I did the flow program as well with Stephen Cotler and that team. Of course, you know, I love flow. And he said he uses flow states to accelerate change. And, you know, but basically what he said too was that identity is tough today because think about it. I started the show, work sucks, but I like it. And I asked the question, how do you define work? Not what do you do, how do you define it? And the reason why I do that is because our identity is built into the question that we're so conditioned to answer in a specific way of what do you do is a thing that trades time for money. And the problem with that is that when Ken, you know, said when you get stripped of that, you lose your identity, right? You lose who you are. And that is it's scary. It's terrifying. But it goes back to what we're talking about earlier in this episode. Go and take those strengths. Even though you might have lost a job, like I didn't, right? Yes, I was a little depressed, but I tapped into my strengths. During that time I was fired, I was able to write my first book. And that was what I did actually, now thinking back is how I found my strengths. Like I had to write it out. Like, what is my life? Like, what is my song and dance? Maybe you just start with simple journaling. Maybe you just start with, again, looking into different personality tests to see your identity. And there's no clear answer, right? Now, of course, you know, I'm excited to read Ken's book on identity and understand kind of how he sort of conceptualizes it and sort of, you know, makes it, you know, practical, if you will. But there's no, to me, as I've interviewed guests, there's no one answer. There is no, oh, that person was a business owner. That's their identity. Absolutely not. Because sometimes, you know, with Naomi, she was, you know, had kids and she did her PhD and, you know, all these other things that you wouldn't know from just asking the question, what do you do? And so, again, what an excellent month. I love kind of doing these recaps too. It's sort of fun to like remember back some of the things that I learned as well, alongside my notes. But thanks again for listening, and we'll see you next time.